TALE OF THE TAPE

Houston Texans Vs. FNL’s Dillon Panthers

The Houston Texans are 5-0, trying to ride the metaphorical undefeated bull as long as they can and become Texas’s favorite team. But Texas and football are a match made in heaven for high schools, universities, and dramatic screenwriters alike. There’s no winning over Texas without first winning over the kings of Friday night, Coach Eric Taylor’s Dillon High School Panthers fromFriday Night Lights. Move the chains!

NOTE: Spoiler alerts if you’ve never seen season one of Friday Night Lights.

Texans
Dillon Panthers
Tennessee Titans v Houston Texans
2008 Summer TCA Tour - Day 13
Record Through Week 5
Winner 5-0
4-1
Quarterback
Winner Matt Schaub: During his senior year at West Chester East High School in West Chester, Pennsylvania, he led the school's football team to win the Ches-Mont League championship.
Matt Seracen: After taking the place of the injured QB1, Seracen drove his Panthers all the way to the Texas State Championship.
Coach Quotes
"It's about the team. And like we said last night, like we said today...Yes we can!"
Winner "Every man at some point in his life is going to lose a battle. He is going to fight, and he is going to lose. But what makes him a man is at the midst of that battle, he does not lose himself. This game is not over, this battle is not over."
Biggest Player Loss of the Season
Brian Cushing, ACL tear. Bright side? Announcers get to sound classy announcing "Mister Alexander."
Winner Jason Street, Spinal injury. Thanks to hindsight, we know that the Panthers kept their heads up after this serious loss. And then literally, keep their heads up.
Team Chant
Houston....Texans.
Winner "Clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose!"
Cheerleaders
Winner There are two sets of twins, Dresdynn & Schuyler and Michelle & Rachel.
Two words: Lyla Garrity.
Field Sponsor
Winner Reliant - "The Electric Company You Can Rely On"
Buddy Garrity Motors - "I'm Your Buddy!"
Team Mascot
Winner Toro
Panther
Running Back
Winner Fantasy and real football rockstar, Arian Foster. Not only is he a powerhouse on the field, he's writes poetry, raps, keeps a vegan diet, volunteers with the Boys and Girls Club of Houston and gives back to his home town of Albuquerque, New Mexico!
Mr. Dillon High School himself, the Ray Rice of Dillon, Texas, Mr. Brian "Smash" Williams. His quick feet and small stature take him to the top, eventually to college, but not without a few steroids along the way.
Roots
Houston Oilers (currently the Tennesee Titans)
Winner Friday Night Lights (The movie)

The Winner Is

Tennessee Titans v Houston Texans
Winner Texans
6 out of 10

Houston Texans. Since 2002 when the Oilers left Houston for Tennessee, the Texans have spent the last 10 years earning their spot in the NFL and proving that they can win just like the best of 'em. Maybe Coach Gary Kubiak doesn't have the most poetic tongue or the family manskills of a perfected fictional father, but this is football and when you're undefeated you're a winner. Texas forever.

MORE TALES OF THE TAPE

  1. FOXBORO, MA - OCTOBER 16: Tom Brady #12 of the New England Patriots reacts after throwing a touchdown pass during the fourth quarter against the New York Jets at Gillette Stadium on October 16, 2014 in Foxboro, Massachusetts. Airdancer
    Tom Brady Vs. An Airdancer, Who Is Floppier?

    Tom Brady seemed to flop in a recent Pats-Jets game. How does he stand up to one of those inflatable things you see outside of car dealers?

  2. DENVER, CO - OCTOBER 19: Quarterback Peyton Manning #18 of the Denver Broncos drops back to throw on what would be his 509th career touchdown pass in the second quarter of a game against the San Francisco 49ers at Sports Authority Field at Mile High on October 19, 2014 in Denver, Colorado. HOLLYWOOD, CA - MARCH 02: Actor Matthew McConaughey poses in the press room during the Oscars at Loews Hollywood Hotel on March 2, 2014 in Hollywood, California.
    Peyton Manning’s TD Record Or Matthew McConaughey’s Oscar More Expected?

    Peyton Manning broke the career TD record. Everyone knew it was coming. But was it as expected as Matthew McConaughey’s Oscar?

  3. (Photo by Scott Halleran/Getty Images) (Photo by Jason Miller/Getty Images)
    Tale Of The Tape: Houston Texans At Pittsburgh Steelers

    The Texans have been pushing hard in recent weeks and nearly got the best of the Cowboys and the Colts, but they couldn’t get past either one.

See All Tales of the Tape
Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,078 other followers